As the saying goes, all good things must end. Tonight was the season finale of Jersey Shore: Family Vacation.

As the gang sits down for their final family dinner, they discuss their fondest memories of the Miami trip. A visit from Vinny’s adorably overbearing mom and unhinged uncle. Angelina, the rogue castmate from earlier seasons, making a brief, yet surprising cameo. Nicole and Ronnie “spiraling” (getting blackout drunk) in broad daylight.

All was lovely and wonderful until Jenni decided to start some needless drama between Ronnie and Mike. They’ve been at each other’s throats since the beginning of The Shore, but it all came out at dinner.

Apparently, Ronnie privately told Mike that he was going to rehab after the show finishes, but Jenni brings it up at the dinner table, you know, because that’s normal dinner table conversation. Ronnie blows up and “The Situation,” ever the voice of reason, desperately tries to assuage… the situation. Jenni just had to stir the damn pot.

To make matters worse, after the fight she says that they shouldn’t discuss personal, outside matters in the house, when she was the one who brought it up! Just when I thought I was going to have a relaxing evening at home enjoying my programs, I’m getting all heated over a damned Jersey Shore family feud. Needless to say, dinner was awkward that night. Not to worry, they hugged it out.

The following night, DJ Pauly D gets a gig at Eleven, one of the group’s favorite strip clubs. Dollar bills are flying, butts are shaking and Pauly is spinning the fist-pumping beats. Everyone is getting along swimmingly and all it took was alcohol and strippers! Honestly, it looked like a blast and I’m jealous that I wasn’t there. I sincerely don’t think I could keep up with them though, they’re professionals.

The next day, hung over and wearing matching “If found, please return to the Jersey Shore” t-shirts, the crew has breakfast and discusses their separate plans for the future. Some are going home to their kids and baby mamas and some have court dates to attend, but overall, the future looks bright for this bunch.

Admittedly, I’m sad to see them go. But never fear! Our favorite guido group will return in August for their next excursion in Las Vegas! And you know what they say — what happens in Vegas gets aired on television for the whole world to see. Things are bound to get reckless and wild. I can’t wait.

Thank you, Lord, for blessing us with what we so truly desire. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, if MTV keeps churning out seasons of Jersey Shore, I’ll keep watching.






About Author

Nice Girl extraordinaire, purveyor of all things Pittsburgh, firmly believes that Stephen Colbert should be president, finds the term “selfie” abhorrent, advocate for the appropriate application of alliteration.

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