The time has come, ladies and gentlemen. Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino is officially settling down.

You may remember Mike from the original Jersey Shore as the one who was always lifting up his shirt to show off his stomach to the ladies at the club, or as the guy who exclusively referred to himself as “The Situation” in any and all conversation. Well, he’s traded in his abs of steel and the up-all-night-to-party lifestyle for all-you-can-eat buffets and total sobriety.

He’s grown up quite a bit since “The Shore” first aired in 2009, and it shows. He’s become somewhat of the voice of reason amongst the housemates, probably due to the fact that he’s the only one who is no longer clouded by absurd amounts of alcohol.

On the most recent episode of Jersey Shore: Family Vacation, Sorrentino proposed to his long-time ride-or-die girl, Lauren Pesce. They met in college and after knowing each other for 15 years, “The Situation” decided to formally take himself off the market and make an honest man of himself.

In true Jersey Shore fashion, the whole gang was involved, and while the cute couple went out to dinner, Pauly, Vinny, Ron, Nicole, Jenni, and Deena prepped the house for the proposal of a lifetime.

Fueled by adrenaline and wine, they all ran around strategically placing hundreds of candles throughout the property of their Miami mansion and rolled out a long, white aisle that stretched from the front door to the proposed proposal site in the backyard. The sweet, albeit over-the-top, proposal was complete with rose petals, balloons and tons of alcohol. Sorrentino dropped $1,000 on flowers alone, which is surprising because he may be jailed in the near future for tax evasion.

I can’t imagine spending that much money on something that’s going to die in a day and a half. I guess MTV is cutting him a pretty hefty check, so hell, why not splurge a little on a night like this?

Regardless, the evening went off without a hitch. DJ Pauly D was spinning the tunes while a video montage of photos of the soon-to-be betrothed duo played. Not going to lie, I got a little verklempt.

As tradition goes, Sorrentino got down on one knee, popped the question, and Ms. Pesce responded with an overwhelming “yes” to becoming Mrs. The Situation. A lively party ensued as they celebrated the newly engaged twosome.

Tears were shed, drinks were spilled and a lovely time was had by all. That includes we, the devoted JS audience. I think Deena said it best when she said, “We had fun and kept it classy, for the most part.”

All things considered, who could ask for anything more?

About Author

Nice Girl extraordinaire, purveyor of all things Pittsburgh, firmly believes that Stephen Colbert should be president, finds the term “selfie” abhorrent, advocate for the appropriate application of alliteration.

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