1. Invite Claus von Bülow over for a pajama party
  2. Come from a family with a history of Alzheimer’s
  3. Take up boxing. Sustain repeated concussions.
  4. Store your bowling ball on an uneven, high shelf
  5. Vacation in Hawaii near a wild rat sanctuary
  6. Prove to your friends that a cap gun can’t kill you by firing it next to your head.
  7. Text while driving
  8. Start a game of chicken with a long-haul trucker on meth
  9. Lose a game of chicken with a long-haul trucker on meth
  10. Enthusiastic auto-erotic asphyxiation
  11. BONUS TIP FOR JEWS, HOMOSEXUALS AND GYPSIES: It’s never too late to connect with your roots! Turn on the oven.
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About Author

Lawyer, literary agent, book packager, film producer, writer, New Yorker.

Likes long walks on the beach and little dogs. Hates mean people and when the pharmacy runs out of Klonopin.

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